Life, as it often does, has kept me wonderfully, overwhelmingly busy. My days have been a whirlwind of freelance deadlines demanding intense focus, joyous but energy-sapping playdates filled with laughter and chaos, and a rather profound personal struggle with a stubborn running injury that prompted a full-blown pity party for one. Amidst this vibrant tapestry of daily life, a new and formidable challenge emerged: preparing for a series of broadcast media appearances. These engagements, where I was to act as a spokesperson, pulled me far beyond the comfortable boundaries of my usual routine, consuming my thoughts and energy entirely for over a week. Imagine the sheer terror, then, of appearing on live television to make breakfast – not once, but three times in a single week, with two of those being live broadcasts. (Cue the internal “EEK” emoji!)
Video cameras have always invoked a particular brand of panic in me. The very notion of being live on air, exposed to countless eyes and potential scrutiny, was utterly terrifying. Yet, paradoxically, it was precisely this intense feeling of unease that solidified my resolve to accept the challenge. Whenever I encounter a profound sense of apprehension about an endeavor, I engage in a crucial self-inquiry: Is this trepidation stemming from a misalignment with my core values? Is it a genuine intuition warning me that this is a truly bad idea? If the answer to both questions is a resounding no, then I understand that the powerful urge to retreat is merely fear in disguise. It is the primal fear of the unknown, the crippling fear of failure, or perhaps even the comical fear of inadvertently becoming a viral internet sensation – “Girl sets fire to dress while making granola on TV; girl runs around fiery studio naked with spatula!” Recognizing fear for what it is transforms it from a barrier into a clear indicator of an invaluable opportunity for personal growth.
You will either step forward into growth or you will step back into safety – Abraham Maslow
This wisdom from Abraham Maslow deeply resonates with my recent experiences. His profound insight underscores a fundamental choice we all face when confronted with challenges: to bravely move towards personal development or to retreat to the familiar comfort of what is safe and known. This powerful dichotomy is a recurring theme, often illuminated with great clarity by authors like Elizabeth Gilbert in her inspiring book, Big Magic: Creative Living Without Fear. While it’s been several months since I last delved into its pages, and I won’t attempt a perfect paraphrase, I can certainly share the transformative essence of what I took away from her exploration of fear and creativity.
Gilbert’s philosophy, as I remember it, suggests that fear is not an adversary to be vanquished or an emotion to be eradicated. Rather, it is an inherent, ever-present companion on any journey that involves venturing beyond one’s comfort zone, embarking on a new project, or embracing a fresh experience. The more intensely we resist its presence, attempting to banish it or silence its voice, the stronger, louder, and more insistent it inevitably becomes. Her profound advice, therefore, is not to engage in a futile battle with fear, but to consciously make peace with it. Accept its existence as an integral part of your being, always present on every adventure you dare to undertake. Invite it along for the ride, acknowledging its concerns and listening to its cautionary whispers. Crucially, however, while you permit it a voice, you must never grant it a vote in your decisions. Allow fear to be a passenger in your vehicle of life, observing the journey and perhaps even offering some useful observations, but under no circumstances should you ever relinquish the steering wheel to it. You, and only you, are the driver of your destiny.
Applying this philosophy to my broadcast appearances proved incredibly empowering. The initial segment was fraught with intense nervousness, costing me precious hours of sleep. However, with each subsequent appearance, armed with the understanding that fear was merely a passenger, the experience became progressively easier. The second and third broadcasts felt like a breeze in comparison. There were no studio fires, thankfully no accidental nudity, and not even a single spilled grain of granola. #win! This experience truly affirmed the power of confronting one’s fears. Now, I pose the question to you: Is there anything you deeply desire to do, a dream you wish to pursue, but find yourself held back by the persistent whispers of fear?
Shifting gears from philosophical reflections to culinary delights, I’m excited to share a recipe for this truly exquisite buttermilk apricot cake. I baked this particular cake several weekends ago for a gathering at a friend’s house, and it was an absolute hit. This cake boasts an incredibly tender crumb, achieved through the magical combination of tangy buttermilk and the rich, moistening power of butter. It’s studded generously with sweet, ripe apricot halves that, once baked, transform into delightful, jammy puddles of concentrated fruit flavor. The subtle, yet impactful, splash of almond extract in the batter is a game-changer, elevating and perfectly setting off the natural sweetness and tartness of the apricots. The aroma alone as it bakes is enough to transport you to a summer orchard.
Baking with apricots is one of my ultimate culinary pleasures. Their unique texture and flavor profile make them an ideal fruit for cakes and desserts. As they bake, the firm flesh softens beautifully, dissolving into those irresistible jammy puddles that release their sweet, tangy juices into the cake. The resulting smooth texture they impart is simply wonderful and divine. Each bite offers a burst of summery fruit intertwined with the tender, moist cake, making it a truly unforgettable experience.
Before I leave you with the full recipe to create your own magnificent buttermilk apricot cake, can we just circle back to my aforementioned pity party for a brief moment? My running injury, while not life-threatening, has been a real drain on my energy and spirits, putting a temporary halt to one of my greatest passions. So, I am currently accepting any and all forms of sympathy, however small. A warm hug, a generous bar of chocolate (dark, please!), or even a simple, heartfelt “aww, muffin” would go an incredibly long way in lifting my spirits. Your kindness would be greatly appreciated. Thanks for understanding! 🙂
Buttermilk Apricot Cake
Jennifer Pallian BSc, RD
20
40
1
8
Ingredients
- 1 ½ lbs ripe apricots, halved and pitted. Choose firm but yielding apricots for the best flavor and texture.
- 1 cup unsalted butter, softened to room temperature. This ensures a smooth, emulsified batter.
- 1 ½ cups granulated sugar.
- 2 large eggs, at room temperature.
- 1 ½ tsp pure vanilla extract.
- ¼ tsp pure almond extract. This enhances the fruity notes beautifully.
- 13.5 oz (approximately 3 cups spooned and leveled) all-purpose flour.
- 1 tsp baking soda. This reacts with the buttermilk for a light texture.
- 1 tsp kosher salt. Essential for balancing flavors.
- 1 cup buttermilk, at room temperature.
- 3 tbsp brown sugar, for topping and caramelization.
Instructions
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Prepare Baking Pans: Preheat your oven to 350ºF (175ºC). Lightly grease and flour two 9-inch by 2-inch round cake pans. For easy removal and to prevent sticking, line the bottoms of the pans with a circle of parchment paper.
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Prepare Apricots: Take about 4 of the apricots and cut them into quarters. Toss these quartered apricots with the brown sugar in a small bowl. The sugar will help them caramelize beautifully on top of the cake. Dice the remaining apricots into smaller pieces. Set both bowls of apricots aside.
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Combine Dry Ingredients: In a large mixing bowl, thoroughly whisk together the all-purpose flour, baking soda, and kosher salt. Whisking ensures these ingredients are evenly distributed, which is crucial for uniform leavening.
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Cream Butter and Sugar: In the bowl of a stand mixer fitted with the paddle attachment (or using a hand mixer), beat the softened butter with the granulated sugar on medium-high speed. Continue beating for 3-4 minutes, or until the mixture becomes very light, pale, and fluffy. Make sure to scrape down the sides of the mixer bowl once or twice during this process to ensure everything is incorporated. Next, beat in the eggs one at a time, ensuring each egg is fully incorporated before adding the next. Finish by beating in the pure vanilla extract and pure almond extract.
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Alternate Wet and Dry Ingredients: With the mixer speed set to medium-low, gradually add about one-third of the flour mixture to the butter mixture, beating just until combined. Follow this with half of the buttermilk, mixing until just incorporated. Repeat this process: add another third of the flour mixture, then the remaining buttermilk, and finally the last third of the flour mixture. Remember to scrape down the sides of the bowl between additions to ensure a smooth, uniform batter. Once the last of the flour is added, remove the bowl from the stand mixer and gently fold in the diced apricots using a spatula. Be careful not to overmix, as this can lead to a tough cake.
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Bake the Cakes: Divide the prepared batter evenly between the two cake pans and gently smooth the tops with a spatula. Artfully scatter the reserved apricot quarters and any accumulated juices over the surface of both cakes. Place the pans in the middle rack of your preheated oven and bake for approximately 40 minutes, or until the cakes are golden brown and spring back lightly when pressed in the center. A wooden skewer inserted into the center should come out clean.
Tried this recipe? Share your thoughts below!